Black paints the canvas into a dark cast.
Small shimmers of light ignite a forgotten past.
For what is a beginning without its end
Cherish the journey while its in its midst
Novelties of flesh die with it.
Gold will tarnish, as flowers wilt until they wither
No thief is a greater poacher than time
So at what point do you live like you have one life
“Amary,” my moms scream echoed through the house. It’s been this way every morning since I could remember. Her and dad cooking breakfast together dancing around. Then once it’s finished the nostalgic scream.
Now.
“Amary,” it bounces off the walls.
“I’m coming.”
My bag is packed, its walls bulge from my smush in pants and shirts. I almost had to sit on top of it just to zip the bottom with my shoes. I could only bring three pairs, how many combinations could you put together with that. Not nearly enough. The only redemption is I can wear my extra pair with my favorite outfit on the first day. Platform zipped boots that boost me up a couple inches. My pants flare out with slits showing the subtle hint of brown from my shoes. Rolled sleeves and my collar popped open and I leave the two buttons undone
Before I make it down stairs, hints of breakfast caress against my nose. Eggs scrambled with cheese and fresh bacon out of the oven. I don’t even have to smell it, I know dad made me custom pancakes with blueberries marinated inside.
“She appears,” my dad grumbles, still working at the stove.
“In only two calls, she must have actually slept last night.”
She would usually be right, but I actually couldn’t get a wink of sleep so I’ve just been rearranging my bag over and over. Of course the small beat of makeup will cover the bags for today.
“Morning parents, it’s my special day.”
My dad turns away from the stove, eyeing me for the first time. At first I’m not sure what look he’s trying to make. Happiness or sadness, maybe both.
“What are you about to cry dad?”
He doesn’t respond. Instead he lunges toward me and gives me a deep hug. We both share a moment of silence.
“Amary, you make me so proud”
“Thank you,” I choke the words.
He’s a loving man, in the mornings he wakes up early to make mom tea, then always starts breakfast for the two of us before we even ask. Most wouldn’t realize with his broad shoulders and solid frame. I mean he’s built more like a tree trunk than a man. To us though, he is a gentle giant with a heart of gold.
“Elias move, let me hold my daughter too”
Mom pushes him away, or rather he steps to the side. She doesn’t hug me tight like him though, instead she holds my face with her soft palms. Through my teary eyes I can see her beautiful rounded face. She would be the cover of all the papers, if dad wasn’t so stingy.
“You’ve grown so beautiful,” She says softly. “Since you were little you dreamed of going to the academy, screaming all over the place.”
We both start laughing and she brings my head in and kisses me on my forehead. That one moment washed away the guilt I felt for leaving my parents behind. I’ve tried to hide it as discreetly as I can but it seems I’ve been outed. Then we sit as a family together eating our last breakfast as one. Jokes from my dad get shot down with reprimands from mom. Stories of my childhood pop up, embarrassing ones more often than accomplishments. Dad even brings up the one boyfriend I had back in early school.
“The kid pissed his pants as soon as I opened the door,” He laughs at his own joke as me and mom share a look.
A knock on the door interrupts us.
My dad raises up and heads for it, I trail behind him trying to see who it is.
“Morning-morning, would you happen to be the father of Ms. Amary Riddle?”
Before my dad can respond I wrap around him swiftly interjecting whatever his reply would be.
“I’m her” I grin widely at the blonde haired skinny woman.
“Fantastic, fantastic. Your pa looks a charming chap, I am your transport to the Academy of Solara. My name is Lorna.” Then she does a courteous bow.
I bow in return.
“Good show- good show, lead me to where you would like to transport from and we will can have this done swiftly”
So I point her to the stairs and into my room. Except instead of joining her I run back down to give my parents a final goodbye.
When I come back into my room Lorna is already holding onto my bag.
“Okay, I’m ready now” I say to Lorna.
She looks at me for a second, then down at her wrist. She taps towards a vein twice and words tattoo on her skin. I try for a better glance seeing if reading the words was possible but I don’t recognize the lettering.
“Without the proper study,” She says, recognizing my curiosity. “These letters will seem unreadable or even gibberish. I will go over a couple basic questions before we transport. Please answer them to the best of your ability.”
I nod in approval
“Why do you want to enter the Academy of Solara?”
“I want to wield crimson to leave an impact on earth. Crimson is necessary for humanity to evolve, I want to start the evolution.”
She taps her wrist at the answer. More lettering appears on her pale wrist. I’m not sure if it’s the next question or her writing down my answers.
“How many lives do you have left?”
“I’m not sure,” I lie.
“Do you know why that question is important?”
“Because the amount of lives someone has determines how effective they are with crimson. The Reduxed or humans with one more life, tend to wield crimson crudely.”
She taps her wrist twice again and more letters appear.
“Good show- good show, we’re all set, grab your bag and hold my hand tightly dear.”
I lift my black bag by the extended handle and head towards her. When I grip her hands I notice an odd sensation from them. It felt like I could almost grab through them like a cloud. Then I noticed the odd lettering, it tattoos up my hand. Except this time it floods onto me, then quickly it snakes around my forearm up to my shoulder. Within a moment I notice the sensation wrapped around me from my breast down to my toe. Crimson was more advanced than I could ever imagine.
”Attention now Amary, within a moment this room will disappear and we will be separated from each other. Don’t panic during this, I am still here just we’re going to be in different parallel spatial cavities.”
I nod in agreement but I’m still caught in a daze from the first showing. Then it’s just like she says, except the room doesn’t disappear. It stretches like rubber until everything is just lines of different colors in my room. My hand still grips onto the disappeared Lorna, because I fear if I release it we will be lost from each other. The marvels of the stretched lights doesn’t last long as I notice the colors changed and the rubber stretch back to normal. When it finally starts to look like a different room I immediately notice the candles lit around me and an altar I stand on.
”Welcome-welcome to the Temple of Rocar,” Lorna’s voice comes from behind me.
”This is one of the four sacred temples I read about before I applied here. Rocar was created out of the broken stone and wood from villages smashed in an uprising that killed the last king of men.”
”Precisely,” Lorna lets out a kind smile.
”Rocar chose you Amary, and it responds to you well with lit candles. This is a great temple only the few get chosen. Even less are received well.”
Is it possible that it’s connected to how many lives someone has I ponder.
”I’m truly honored Lorna.” I try to speak humbly.
”Honor the temple, not I. Come now though, I’d like to have you settled in to make your intro courses. In the past 15 years I have not had one late student on the first day of arrival, it mustn’t change today.”
Then she steps past me quickly and strides her legs towards the door. It almost makes her feel child-like how she loftily swings her arms back and forth.
I follow suit, except slowly. I study the inside of the temple, trying to really gather information. Notably odd lettering was painted on the decorative wall, and the booths of chairs had numbers etched in them in Roman Numerals.
The sun peers into the room blinding me for a moment. I hear the foot traffic, loudly in fact. Horns beeping, traffic directors with megaphones screaming. When I step out completely from the temple’s hard stone down I’m dumbfounded at the sight. People bustling around, vendor stands with trinkets and magic items. Floating mails shooting across the sky and stone paths with craftsmanship of only master stone cutters. I barely notice Lorna getting away from me
”Wait for me” I scream out.
She doesn’t. So instead I shake off this new environment and put my left foot in front of the right. Steadily I’m away from the temple and become a part of the crowd of traffic. Shoulder to shoulder people rub, bump, and touch me to get by. It’s like rats in a maze except for thousands of men and women. I do my best to never lose sight of Lorna but I still have my bags with me and it’s already hard enough just trying to walk normally. Still I fight the mob and push forward.
Until something slams into my shoulder knocking me over. My bags slip out of my hand and I’m on the ground.
“Ughhh” I let out a groan of defeat.
”Need a hand,” a large hand cast my vision dark.
”Yes, thank you,” I take the hand and lift up and start to dust off.
”I couldn’t thank you enough.”
”Ad astra per aspera,” a deep voice grumbled.
I finally look up at my Samaritan. He is handsome… Unbelievably handsome, he has tinted glasses that barely hide his colored eyes. His jawline is sharp but gently rounded at the chin, and his lips are full. I don’t even realize after a while how much I’m staring at him until he changes his smile to a confused stare.
“You’ve never heard that before?” He said, breaking the awkward silence.
“To the stars through difficulties. It’s a saying around here for people who complete the journey to the academy grounds.”
”Sorry- um.. I have heard it. Actually no, I’ve read about it before I came,” the words fumble out of my mouth.
”I see, well hopefully I’m the first to tell you,” he says with a bright smile.
”Actually my guide Lorna told me when we first arrived” I lie.
To my surprise he starts laugh giddily, as if I told the first joke he’d heard.
”I see- Miss.”
”Amary”
”Ms. Amary, then I apologize for wasting so much of your time, and for knocking you over. I’ll be seeing you around.”
Then he turns around and starts to walk, but I lunge and grab his arm. He half turns and I’m so close up to him now I can see underneath his glasses. His eyes are like clouds weeping grey all over the sky.
”You never told me your name.”
”Atom, my name is Atom” He says again with a bright smile and chuckle.
“I’ll see you around then Mr. Atom” I mock him.
We both share a brief chuckle and he walks back into the mob of people. Then when I finally turn around, bag in hand, and I see the most terrifying creature.
”AMARY” Lorna screams at me, anger plastered on her face.
”You, you will not ruin my reputation, we are taking you directly to class now. I will take your bags to the dorm room and drop them off. I am not your luggage holder, this is gonna cost you.”
The woman can be scary when she wants to. So I just nod and follow her on. We weave past people, buildings and stands. I want to fully embrace my new temporary home but Lorna doesn’t let go of my hand dragging along. It’s not long before we finally arrive at the main building of the academy and it’s huge. The sheer size is overwhelming but the architecture is beautiful. Pillars of quarts line the entrance giving it a feeling of luxury. Window arches of stone veneers and walls etched with fine design. The academy might as well double as a castle of kings.
“Welcome- welcome to the Academy of Solara.” Lorna turns and smiles at me.
“It’s breathtaking”
“It took over 100 years to build and has stood for almost nine times that, reinforced by crimson. Our ancestors created this fortress for students to change our world.”
Lorna notices I’m still lost in the sight and grabs my hand back. I feel an odd sensation this time, again like her hand is grabbing through me.
“Sorry about this but the time is cutting close, I’m gonna warp us to your classroom.”
Lettering smolders and spreads from her hand twisting up my arm. It slithers all the way up my shoulder and soon wraps my torso. I don’t even have a chance to speak before I notice the floor and scenery around my stretch across forward until it’s nothing but lines of color in my vision. Again I’m alone in a rainbow of colors surrounding my body but instead I feel peaceful. I wanted nothing but to get to the academy since I learned about crimson. I wanted the power to give my life meaning, and purpose. This would finally be my chance.
“Tripp.. Peter.. Trina.. Darla.. Christina..” I hear names calling out from the lights.
“June.. Ben.. Mickey.. Aries.. Atom..”
“Amary.”
There’s a pause after I hear my name. Then finally the colors of the lights begin to change and I notice the stretch of space coming back towards me.
“Amary.. Do we have an Amary present here?” The voice calls again.
Then in a moment space has stretched all the way back to normal and I’m sitting in a classroom. Except unlike the temple the noise of warp isn’t silent. I feel the entirety of the room’s eyes turn towards my seat. Lorna is nowhere to be found and my bag is gone.
“Are you Amary Riddle?”
It comes from an older man at the front of the room. His hairs have started to grey but he’s well groomed, it betrays an exact age.
“I am,” I say, unsure of anything else to do.
“Spectacular entrance I must say, you must’ve given Lorna a heart attack trying to get here on time. Reputation-reputation, I must never lose it,” he mimics her voice.
I chuckle at the joke but internally I feel bad for giving her such a hard time honestly. At least everyone has stopped staring at me and back at him.
“Now that we have everyone present. Welcome to the Academy of Solara, students from far and wide. I am Professor Luther, this is the introduction course to the academy where all new students begin regardless of their status.”
I’m listening to Luther but feel a soft nudge on my left arm. When I turn to look, I know that I’ve been struck with some streak of luck. It’s Atom and he’s smiling right at me. I feel my heartbeat start to speed up and I try to return a soft smile back.
”I will now explain Crimson to you all, bear with me if you already understand the basics of its usage.”
I jerk my head back towards Luther.
“Crimson is a natural energy emitted by all living things, humans for the past century have held onto the most crimson emitted naturally without any enhancers. This is because we have cultivated its powers through evolution. Humans are now born users of this energy. This also means that depending on ancestry some will be born with more or less of this energy.”
A hand raises in the front of the room from a dark skinned woman with long locs of hair.
“Yes Ms. Aries”
“Does this amount of crimson also tie into how many lives someone has?”
“Yes and no. No concrete research has shown that the amount of crimson has anything to do with extra lives humans have but it has been shown that if in your past life you were a strong crimson wielder. You would accumulate that energy faster like you would transfer into your new life. This is why it’s important we know how many life’s someone has left before being admitted into school. The only problem is that people in their first life won’t know how many they have left until the first one is over.”
Another hand raises except this time it’s from Atom beside me.
“Yes Mr. Atom”
“Well we know the average human is born with 8 to 10 lives but in some cases we’re only born with 2 to 3. On the other hand, some people can be born with up to 15 and 18. Crimson development does spread between these different lives but you’re only reborn with knowledge of how many lives you have left, not of any knowledge of your past life. Has there been a crimson breakthrough that has allowed people to link previous selfs back to them?”
Luther smiled broadly, it wasn’t the type of smile of amusement one of content.
“Bingo,” he said loudly. “We have created a technique that is able to link people back and retain back all the information they previously acquired.”
The other students marveled at the statement, faces lit with excitement. How could they be so excited? Where is the fear of the person who doesn’t exist any longer, another version of you who had an entirely different world view.
“Before we get to excited students, this technique is not common practice and can be dangerous if exploited.”
Audible sighs resounded in the room. Except I didn’t hear anything from Atom. This brought me comfort that I wasn’t the only one even if our thoughts differed.
“This introductory day is shorter than a normal day , everyone takes the afternoon to become familiar with academy grounds and dorms.”
Then Luther clapped his hands twice and a bell rang on his desk. I jumped out of my seat for the opportunity, this was the moment I’d been waiting on. Other students did the same buzzing out of the room cliquing up with each other. Just when I was making my way to the door Luther’s voice called out calm and collected.
“Amary. Atom, I need a moment”
Atom froze behind me first. Internally I let out the biggest sigh. Nonetheless I sat down in a seat closer to the front. It wasn’t long before the last of the students disappeared from the classroom leaving just Atom and I.
Luther didn’t speak at first, he just stepped around his desk and leaned against it. From his face I wasn’t sure what he was thinking.
“Atom you asked me a good question, and to an extent I told the truth, well I told all the other students needed to know.”
Then he walked forward and scooted a seat out close to us. When he spoke this time it was quiet enough that I could barely hear him.
“Both of you are special.”
I’m about to question him but my mouth doesn’t move or better yet can’t move. Glancing over I see the same happen to Atom.
“Hear me first before you reply, children.” The words rendered slow and deliberate.
“You both are reduxed.”
Then I sink deep into the chair. The words pressed against my chest aggressively smothering me. All I can feel is my heart thumping hard like a drum.
“Calm down, I said you were special not because you are reduxed. Your last life just negates you from attending the academy due to reckless behavior. No both of you are special because of a binding string that weaves you both back together.”
The words do calm me and when I look over, Atom seems to feel the same.
“Mr. Luther, I’m confused, what do you mean?” Atom interjects
“It would be easier to show both of you, I can’t fully explain through words.”
Then he gets out of his seat and turns to the door. With a swift movement of his arm the door follows the flow and shuts. Then he steps towards his desk until he makes it all the way behind. Frozen he stands there awkwardly looking at me and Atom.
”Are you two just going to stare at me or come around here?”
It caught me off guard and I even let out a slight chuckle before getting up. When Atom walks in front of me, I can’t help thinking how he’s reduxed as well.
Luther’s oak desk has an intricate design of patterns you would’ve never see from the other side. Knobs and handles are sticking out of different engravings and Luther was leaned over looking at them.
”Which one? Which one” he murmured
“This one”
With a twist and a pull, the knob extends outward on a long metal rod, stopping just short of detaching from the desk. Luther twisted it once more, and it snapped back into place. Suddenly, glowing lettering spilled from the knob, spreading across the surface like ink splashed by an artist’s hand.
Then, with a soft hiss and a faint dramatic mist, the desk splits open. A platform rose slowly, revealing a glass contraption made of interwoven tubes, all circling around a small, polished bowl.
“This,” Luther said, “is the device invented by the founders of our academy. It will show you your past lives and restore your memories and Crimson’
“How does it work?” I asked, eyes fixed on the bizarre machine.
“You place your hand in the opening on the left. A needle will draw five milliliters of blood.”
Luther tapped the rim of the device. “Crimson lives in the bloodstream—like a dormant frequency. It’s your life force, the thread that follows you from one life to the next. Every time you’re reborn, Crimson keeps a record: your memories, your reflexes, even your habits. It doesn’t just store who you were—it stores what you could do.”
“That’s… all in my blood?”
“Not in your blood,” he corrected gently, “but in the Crimson inside your blood. There’s a difference. Crimson is more than biology—it’s the bridge between lives, part energy, part memory. Like how we use it to imbue objects and perform tasks, it can also bind your past selves to your current body.”
He gestures to the glass tubes.
“This device takes that Crimson and filters it with a specific task: to awaken your latent potential from past lives. Like flipping through the pages of your entire existence.”
He motioned to the basin, faintly glowing now.
“At the end, it flows into the bowl of water. With just a sip, your body rewires itself. The Crimson reconnects your brain to your old memories and your muscles to their former functions. And if someone else drinks from the same bowl, they see your past too—every moment, every life—like plugging a flash drive into a mind instead of a machine.”
I step past Luther and stare at the device. This is my final life—and I need to know how I spent the rest of them. I raise my hand and slowly slide it into the opening. A soft prick meets my palm. I watch the meter fill, then withdraw my hand and see the blood swirling inside the tubes, stained crimson and filtered through glowing glass.
It’s a marvel, something born from the sheer will of human invention. When the process ended, the last drops of my blood settled into the bowl of water.
“Would you grant me the honor to see your memories as well, Amary?” Luther asked.
“Ask me again in ten minutes,” I reply.
I pick up the bowl, and Atom’s eyes follow my every move. I take a deep gulp, afraid a smaller sip might fail. A sudden rush of heat tears through me not inside, but under my skin. My veins start bubbling, seething pain shoots in me like I’m being boiled alive
Then everything goes black.
I remember it all, memories all the way back to my very first life. Atom or, Atom in this life I should say. He’s always been with me in every lifetime.
In our first life, he was a soldier I met when his platoon visited my family’s farm. He took me away from the campfire that night and confessed his love at first sight. His clean cut and beautiful smile first caught my eye, but how sweet he was to me made me fall in love. We lived that life out on a farm where we moved after he left the military.
For about our first nine lives, we did almost the exact same thing.
In my tenth life, I was born in the city and worked for a newspaper company. He walked in big, tall and skinny looking for a job. This time, it was me who fell for him. During his interview, I asked him how he felt about work relationships. His response was, “I never put much thought to it until I walked in here and saw a beauty like you.” That life, we got married and had two daughters: Leann and Jasmine.
In our twentieth life, Crimson was on the rise and I was a prodigy. Life was a lot simpler then, big schools or cities. So I became a practitioner in a field not too far from my home. Day after day, I worked on making different Crimson-powered devices, stemming from bathrooms to thermostats.
On one of my most ambitious projects to get water to transfer from one tube to the next while purifying the bacteria in it. I was about to taste the water when Atom walked up and snatched the cup from my hand.
“All scientists need a test subject, don’t they?”
Then he chugged the entire cup. It wasn’t long before he was retching on the floor from the dirty water. The feeling I felt when looking at him wasn’t curiosity or disgust but love, bubbling in my stomach.
Years later, after that moment, he helped me create a device that was so revolutionary we were scared to even reveal it to the world: a Crimson converter that took your life force, separated it from the Crimson, and revealed your past lives.
I remember now that Atom and I have lived a hundred lives together and we’ve used this device for at least the last eighty of them. Nothing had changed. We still loved and chose each other. Then, we created a school together in our fiftieth life, a place where people could become practitioners of their own. We made a rule that only during the graduation ceremony would we allow students to use the device.
I turned to Atom and got a good look at my soulmate for the last ninety-nine times, and I feel the same way I did when I was that farm girl. Nothing has changed. And now he looks at me without a clue how connected we are.
“Amary, are you okay?” he ask gently.
I don’t answer, I hold the bowl and walk towards him. Without hesitation, my husband drinks. Except when he puts the bowl down, I lunge toward him and kiss him deeply. The water slides between our mouths as our tongues intertwine. He grasps onto my hips and pull me in deeper and I can feel his body heat transfer to me.
The warmth I feel in the moment could light a hundred suns. His soft lips caress mine perfectly.
We don’t stop, but I open my eyes to look at him closely. I’m not surprised when he does the same.
“Have we… done this before?” he smirks at me.
Except I don’t laugh. I can’t. Tears are already forming and starting to rain down my cheeks. So he just holds me tighter.
“I’m gonna step out and come back,” Luther interjects.
We both giggle at his awkwardness and nod a thanks toward him.
“I’m sure I don’t have to ask, but do you remember the poem you wrote in our last life?” Atom asks.
I don’t bother to reply, I just recite to him my favorite poem I ever wrote.
“Black paints the canvas into a dark cast.
Small shimmers of light ignite a forgotten past.
For what is a beginning without its end?
Cherish the journey while it’s in its midst.
Novelties of flesh die with it.
Gold will tarnish, as flowers wilt until they wither.
No thief is a greater poacher than time.
So at what point do you live like you have one life?”
A pause sits between the both of us—not uncomfortable in the present, but like a weight is on us.
“We are in our last life, Amary. This is the last time our souls will meet, but it’s also the last time we do anything with the living. After, we will float into the abyss of time slowly forgotten until nothing is left of our journey. So I ask you, not as Josephine, the farm girl I met on my very first chance at life, but as Amary on our last: how do you want to spend your last?”
“I tell you, Atom not as Lune, the soldier I met on my family farm, whatever we do in this life will hardly be as important as making sure I’m spending all of it with you.”
Then I see a tear sparkle in his eyes. He pulls me back into his chest and lays his head on my shoulder, and in this moment, I feel a continuation of love that broke the barriers of time.